Shabbier By the Minute: Book Preview

Y'all ready to get a little shabby? 

Here's your sneak peek! 

“I have makeup remover, Tiffany. In the bathroom.” She sprinted off to get her freebie towelette and came back looking sort of normal. “If you’re here to talk about Ginger’s text, I don’t want to hear it. I have to power-wash trailers today. End of story. I already told her that. Did she send you over here?” I dumped about three teaspoons of sugar in her mug and handed it to her.

To my surprise, she wasn’t disappointed at all. She stirred her coffee and grinned at me. “No and thank goodness because I really want to be the first one in our unit to earn those dragonfly wings. I mean, I am your recruiter.”

“My what?” I asked her as I tried not to laugh at her.

“Your recruiter. It’s up to you to spread your wings, pardon the pun, and find customers outside our mutual friends. Seriously, Arcadia. You, me and Esme know pretty much the same folks. Is it too much to ask? I’ve gotta pay for Buddy, Partridge and Elvis’ vet appointments.”

I frowned at her. “Are you serious, Tiff? I told you the same thing last night, but you insisted that I join your team. I spent a hundred bucks plus tax on a Bevvy Jane kit, remember? I’m entitled to sell to whoever I want to. But may I remind you that I didn’t want to do this in the first place?”

She sneezed and sloshed coffee on the cheap plastic flooring. Obviously, her springtime allergies were kicking in. Or at least that’s what she called them. I suspected she was allergic to her colony of cats, but she would never admit it. She set the cup down and began dabbing the coffee up with paper towels. “I know, I know, but can’t you sell outside the park? I’ve already got an order from Rita. I called her as soon as I got home last night, and she was really sorry she couldn’t make the party. I think she had a date with Gus, but she spent well over a hundred bucks on that tape. Old ladies love that stuff, you know. Do you know Aunt Mavis bought almost the entire product line? She’s crazy about that tape.”

“Tiffany, don’t tell me you sold Mavis anything. She’s not to be trusted with checks or debit cards. How much is she in for?” I opened the trash can for her so she could deposit the paper towels.
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“She’s good for it, and she believes in the Bevvy Jane products. Look, just do me a favor. Don’t sell to anyone in the park, at least not right away. I want those wings, girl. I really need a win in my life, what with Jeb gone and all.”

I rolled my eyes. “You’ve got to get out more, Tiff.” Before I could talk her down, someone banged on my trailer door. “Who is it now?” I called as I handed my stressed-out bestie her mug again.

“It’s me, Esme.”

“Good Lord. I’m so popular this morning,” I said under my breath. “Hey, girl. Come on in. I think I have some coffee left.”

“Okay, thanks.” Esme flashed her beautiful smile at me and joined Tiffany and me in the kitchen. “I see I’m not the first one here. You’ve got a lot of nerve going behind my back to get Rita, friend.”

Tiffany ratcheted up her saggy blond ponytail as if she were getting ready for a fight. Before she came back with a smartass comment, I asked, “Any chance either of you will help me power-wash today? I sure would appreciate the help.”

“Tiffany is off today, right? You should help her out, bestie,” Esme said in an accusatory tone of voice. Uh-oh. What is going on with these two?

“I’m going to earn those wings before I go into work tonight. It’s all-you-can-eat shrimp at Fry Me a River, and I plan on putting that pin right on my t-shirt.”

“You better wear your pushup bra, Tiffany, or the customers might not see it.”

Tiffany slapped the counter and stepped closer to Esme. “What does that mean? My chest is bigger than yours, Es-mee.”

I stepped in between them. “So no takers on the power-washing? I’m happy to spring for lunch. But I’m not having this squabbling going on in my home, so cut it out, you two. Now, any takers?”

“I’ve got back-to-back hair clients today or you know I’d help you out. I help out friends when they need me, and I don’t stab them in the back.”

Tiffany sputtered but didn’t dare step any closer. “I never stabbed you in the back, Esme; I just made a phone call. But I’m getting those wings first. Hide your clothes and watch. And I’m not going to forget that crack you made about my bosom. Brave words from someone who has no behind to speak of. Wearing your padded drawers today, Esme?”

“I don’t have any padded drawers, Tiffany. That’s only for bras. I know you nabbed that Victoria’s Secret collection from the Goodwill, and you knew I was going to buy them. You just had to undercut me.”

“I did not!”

“You can have Shabby Hearts and Fry Me a River, Tiffany! I have a beauty shop! When I’m not shampooing, cutting or styling, I plan on selling Bevvy Jane to every woman I know. At least my customers won’t smell like crawfish.” Esme glowered at Tiffany as she put her hand on her hip and continued to cock an attitude.
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“That’s fine, Esme, but you remember our agreement. Everyone in the trailer park is mine. I get to sell here. You can have that snobby beauty shop crowd.” 

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